Playing my PlayStation because I am a gaymer.
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There you go.
You'll be playing with your joystick and I'll be playing with mine.
On your own.
[laughter]
[music]
Welcome to The Outlifting Lounge, the weekly show serving queer conversation,
news and no-nonsense fitness for gay, bi and trans guys.
I'm Alan.
And I'm his husband, Derec.
Coming up on today's show, we're going to be talking
about shopping hauls, Drag Race, Madonna, bitching about Nigel Farage,
and we will reveal the world's worst personal trainer.
Stay tuned.
[music ends]
We are celebrating this week.
What are we celebrating?
Well, this might not seem big for some people, but
we hit three and a half thousand followers on Instagram.
We did, which is great.
So thank you to everybody that has been following us
and joining us on the ride that is Outlifting.
The ride that is Outlifting.
[laughs]
The ride.
Yeah, that's not going to be our new slogan.
Yeah, it's been positive.
We also got an email from a spammy, marketing person who
wants to help us promote our podcast and they have revealed
that we are the 35th most listened to podcast in Kyrgyzstan.
Yes, under the category of sexuality, apparently.
So there you go.
If you're listening to us in Kyrgyzstan.
Thank you very much.
Hi.
I don't know how to say hello in your language. Apologies.
I really should have done more research before we started.
[laughter]
Yeah, we're going to take that with a pinch of salt, I think.
Yeah, a whole sea of salt.
[laughter]
That's definitely not something we're going to be celebrating this week.
35th in the sexuality category in Kyrgyzstan.
That's an achievement.
Yeah, apart from that, our week has been good.
We managed to have a shopping day yesterday with our pal, Nik.
We did, which was brilliant.
Alan likes to shop.
You were like Pretty Woman with all of your bags.
I do like to shop, to be fair.
Do you know what it is?
Especially when there's like, there's you, me and Nik.
And it's a case of, get in, have a look
and grab something before one of you two does.
Yeah.
It was a bit like Supermarket Sweep with Dale Winton.
[laughs]
It was.
And also as well, trying to get three gays
out of shops to keep on time was impossible.
We planned to do so many different shops yesterday and do different things.
And we ended up having to cut it short yet again
because we had to get home to walk our dog.
We couldn't leave him in.
And yeah, we were just spending way too long in the shops.
Yeah. But we did well.
We got a good haul.
We went to the Adidas outlet and we got some absolute bargains.
You say Adidas, I say Adidas the way it should be said.
Yeah.
Our Adidas haul was so good.
I cannot believe what we got for just short of 96€.
Yeah. Three pairs of trainers.
Really good trainers as well, like the
Adidas Boosts, and they’re really nice shoes.
What else did we get?
A pair of shorts.
A really nice pair of shorts, actually.
Yeah.
They're quite revealing.
I need thicker pants, I think.
[laughter]
So, we got those.
I got a nice baseball cap.
You did!
And it all came to like 96€.
- Yeah. - But the shoes themselves
each pair of those shoes, if they
were full price, they would have been over 100€ each.
Yeah. If you're ever in Gran Canaria and you fancy a good shopping trip,
you need to go up north to Las Terrazas and El Mirador.
My favourite is Las Terrazas because that's where the
outlets are, but also it allows dogs in.
Yeah.
And there was loads of dogs yesterday.
It's very dog friendly.
What's your other favourite thing about Las Terrazas?
They've got a gym there and so there's some very handsome, beefy
Spanish men always kind of walking through to and from the gym.
Yeah, I was looking at you confused there, but as soon as
you said that, I remembered those two that we saw yesterday.
Dogs and handsome men.
Las Terrazas is where to be! And bargains!
What more could you want?
Yeah, it was a great wee day.
And then El Mirador is more like a traditional shopping centre.
Anybody from the Glasgow area or surrounding area will know Braehead.
That's basically what El Mirador is like and there's my favourite shop
in there called Lefties and I think it's coming to the UK.
They are opening, I think they're opening four stores in the UK and I
think it's in England to start off with and then they'll probably branch out.
But this shop is humongous and it's so cool because you
go and try things on and normally when you try things
on, you maybe only want a couple of them.
You give the clothes that you don't want back to the shop
assistant, but they've actually got a hole in the wall in the
changing room and there's a conveyor belt and you just put the
stuff on the conveyor belt that you don't want.
Yeah, it's like a large glory hole.
[laughter]
You just deposit your unwanted items.
Yeah. It's pretty cool.
Yeah, Lefties is good.
It's owned by the same group as Zara, but it's cheaper.
It's a bit better.
The homeware section is really good.
There's some nice stuff in there.
I know. We didn't have time to look yesterday, so once we move into our new
place, we'll take a wee trip again there and get some new homeware stuff.
Yes, definitely.
And one of the reasons that we were
going shopping yesterday was because...
You're leaving me!
Well, I'm not leaving you.
I'm just going away for the weekend with Nik.
I know.
I'm maybe just being a bit dramatic there, but yeah, you have decided when
you went out with Nik for a few drinks in the sun a few
weeks ago, you concocted a plan to go on holiday together with me.
Not quite. [laughter]
- Nik was already going. - I know.
And he said, why don't you come for the weekend?
Because it's Dean's birthday, another friend of ours that lives here.
And it just so happens to be Sitges Pride that weekend as well.
So it's all came together quite nicely.
And I think the reason, maybe, why you're a wee bit annoyed is because
all day yesterday, Nik and I were like, oh, that's my wee Sitges outfit.
Oh, that'll look great in Sitges.
Yeah, it all came together nicely.
That'll be the only thing that's coming together in Sitges.
[laughter]
You go and have fun.
I am going to be left alone, walking the dog, doing all the mundane things.
And playing my PlayStation because I am a gaymer.
There you go. You'll be playing with your joystick and I'll be playing with mine.
On your own.
[laughter]
On your own!
So, yeah.
And also the weekend that you're away.
So that's like the 13th, 14th of June.
Something like that, yeah.
There is a big night in the Yumbo Centre.
So, obviously, we live in Gran Canaria, in Maspalomas.
And there is a big night in the Yumbo Centre, a big tourism festival.
And they have got Cascada headlining.
So, I'm going to be down there.
You're going to miss that.
Oh, well.
That's fine.
I'm going to be in Sitges.
Enjoying Pride.
That better be all you're in.
[laughter]
We joke.
[laughter]
Yeah.
No. I’m actually being serious.
And what else is happening in June in Gran Canaria?
The Pope.
The Pope! Oh, yeah.
Forgot about that.
So, the Pope is visiting just before that.
I think he's here on the 11th of June.
So, obviously, like, Spain's very, very, very Catholic.
And I think everything's going to come to a standstill when he's here.
It's going to be crazy.
And the reason I said the Pope is because of Snatch Game from
the most recent RuPaul's Drag Race season, where Discord Adams plays the Pope.
Brilliant.
No, she plays the Pope.
The Pope!
That was a good segue, actually.
We didn't even plan that.
No.
Drag Race US season 18 finished this weekend.
And it was a good finale.
You were going to say yesterday there because we watched it yesterday.
Yes. But before we talk about the finale, let's
talk about that RuPaulapalooza from the week before.
Okay.
You haven't stopped talking about it because you thought it was amazing.
So apologies to anybody who is not a Drag Race
fan, but if you're not, why are you listening?
Fast forward.
Skip to the next bit.
If you are a fan, however, if you watched
that RuPaulapalooza, oh my God, it was amazing.
That was so good.
And Juicy Love Dion... The headstand?
Oh, that's all I'm going to say.
That was amazing.
Iconic!
I-con-i-ca!
Brilliant.
It was really good because before we watched it, I
said to you, I actually don't enjoy these because I
find them really boring, but that one was brilliant.
It was, yeah, it was one of the best that I've watched.
And she deserved, I was just about to say something there, but
spoiler, if you haven't watched it, yeah, she deserved to win it.
[laughs]
There will be spoilers for Drag Race season 18.
So again, if you haven't watched it yet, feel free to skip this section.
The chapters are all listed in the show notes
so you know what time to skip ahead to.
So yeah, Juicy Love Dion slayed it and
she absolutely deserved to win that $50,000.
She did and I think, I feel like they've
been throwing money at all the queens this season.
Like when we watched the finale yesterday, it just seemed
like, you get dollars, you get dollars, everybody gets dollars.
I know!
Like Drag Race has got so big and it's just
like, it's got so much money now, it's crazy.
What I wish they would do though, instead of throwing all of this money
out, I wish they would give the queens a stipend at the start.
Because so many of them get into like really serious debt
to put together all of their outfits, all of their costumes.
And then if you get eliminated in the first few weeks,
I mean, it's not a good return on your investment.
So I think what they really should do is give
them all a stipend of maybe like $3000, $4000.
To be fair though, $3000, $4000 isn't going to go
that far for some of the outfits that they do.
I know, true.
But the more creative queens, I think it'll really help them shine.
But anyway, that's enough about politics.
[laugh]
No, we're going to talk about that soon.
Yeah. Let's talk about the Drag Race finale first.
Yes, the finale was brilliant.
We liked all three of the top three.
I was undecided who I wanted to win.
But then once I watched last night, I was like,
yeah, I want the person that won to win.
Are we doing spoilers?
Yeah, we announced it that there would be spoilers.
Myki Meeks!
Yeah.
Myki Meeks was a very worthy winner.
Nini Coco was fierce.
Like, I think out of the three of them, Nini
Coco had the worst odds going into the finale.
But she really turned it out in the finale, I think.
Yeah, and Darlene Mitchell is...
The nation's sweetheart.
But runner up, basically.
But she never, ever had to lip-sync during the whole season.
She's the first queen ever to never have to
lip-sync in 18 seasons, which is quite something.
Yeah.
She's good as well.
She's very good.
We like Darlene.
She's her own thing.
She's very unique, which we like.
- So that's Drag Race finished. - Yeah.
- Yay, sports! - Yay!
[chuckles]
That's our World Cup.
Apparently, there's some other kind of a
World Cup happening soon, don't know?
I don't know.
Nik was being very butch in the
Adidas shop yesterday, trying on football tops.
And I need to speak about this because the
three of us were being the gayest ever.
We were just going, oh, look at that one, look at that one.
Not a fucking clue what team it was or what country it was.
We just liked the colours.
It was so funny.
And there were like big straight guys in, buying
their football tops ahead of the World Cup.
And we were just in going, oh, look at this one.
- It's pink. - I quite liked that pink one.
Apparently it was Germany.
I like the Spain one, the red with the yellow trim.
Very, very nice.
Yeah. I like that.
I would get that.
But then I'm afraid that people will come up and just assume that I'm
Spanish and start speaking to me very fast in Spanish and won't understand them.
About football, which is even worse.
Oh, God.
Can you imagine?
I know.
But what did you say to me yesterday in the shop?
Kind of want to get the Spain tops and then we
can go to like Spanish bars and watch the football.
And then whenever everybody's cheering when Spain win a
goal, we can celebrate with all the straight boys.
Big hugs and cheers and all that.
That'd be fun.
That would be fun. [laughter]
That'd be hot.
Yay, sports! [laughter]
And I guess we should mention the other massive
LGBTQ+ news that Madonna is making a comeback.
Yeah, she has been resurrected.
I'm not the biggest fan of Madonna.
I enjoy her music.
Great.
But I'm just not the biggest fan of her.
So, again, I think I might need to hand back my gay card
because, like, Nik actually audibly gasped yesterday when I told him that.
He's super excited for her coming back.
So, I am not a huge Madonna fan.
I think I was born just a little too late.
I'm a Kylie boy.
Wait, wait, wait.
Did you just throw shade at Nik?
Say that he's old?
No, he is older than me.
I mean, I think anybody maybe like three, four, five
years older than me would probably be the Madonna generation
of gays, whereas I am the Kylie generation of gays.
And then after me came the Britney generation of gays.
So, yeah, I've never been a huge Madonna fan, but
what I will say is her songs are iconic.
Confessions on a Dance Floor, such a banger.
And the track that they have released from this new album is quite good.
It's not, I don't consider it a single.
It's more of a set up for the album.
And if it's anything to go by, I mean, yeah,
I'm really looking forward to listening to the new album.
When she released the first album, I was living here for the first time in
my early 20s, being a little terrace tart.
And just a tart in general.
[laughs]
So it's quite funny that now I'm living here again.
She's releasing it, or part two.
Yeah.
Do you think she did that on purpose?
- Aye. - For you?
Aye, she did, aye.
Okay.
[laughter]
The word revolves around Alan.
Don't you forget it.
Right.
That's enough about pop culture.
We did mention that we were going to get back to politics.
So what we want to briefly discuss is some news from the
last week or two from the UK, and it is one of
our favourite people ever, that little toad of Toad Hall, Nigel Farage.
You say that, I say cunt, Nigel Farage.
[laughter]
But before I go into this, can I just say
that one of my favourite pastimes recently is blocking gays
on Instagram that support Reform and Nigel Farage.
Go do it.
It's really cathartic.
Yeah.
Like, I mean, if you are a member of the rainbow family and you are
thinking about supporting Reform or you do support Reform, give your head a shake.
They are not our friends.
They are our enemy.
You only need to look at what's happened in America to see what's
happening because Reform are basically just trying to copy everything Trump has done
and there is so much buyer's remorse from people who supported Donald Trump
believing his false promises and they are cursing it now.
Look at Caitlyn Jenner.
The leopards have eaten her face because she cannot get a passport
with her gender marker on it and cannot travel safely now.
Hell mend her!
Right, let's talk about Nigel Farage.
So we came across an article: HIV charities criticise Nigel
Farage after Reform UK leader called for asylum seekers to
be banned from receiving HIV treatment on the NHS.
Like, where do you even start with this?
It's just...
I think the best place to start is by calling Nigel Farage a cunt again.
Yes, I think so.
I think so.
So let me read this article from Scene magazine.
So, HIV charities Terence Higgins Trust and National AIDS Trust have
criticised comments made by Nigel Farage on the 13th of April.
The Reform UK leader said he would ban asylum
seekers with HIV from receiving treatment on the NHS.
Now, why do you want to be part of
the problem rather than part of the solution?
Yeah, let's give an example.
Back when the COVID vaccine rollout was happening so that we could
start getting back to some sense of normality after all of the
lockdowns, would anybody have suggested for a second that asylum seekers or
any other population should have been excluded from the vaccine rollout?
No, because we understood that herd immunity was
what was going to move us forward.
And likewise, if we do, if we're serious about stopping transmission of HIV
completely, the way to do that is to make sure as many people
as possible, 100% if we can, of people living with HIV are undetectable.
And the only way they can do that is through treatment.
Absolutely.
There's a target by 2030 and it's a
cross-party effort to end new HIV cases.
So, what's he playing at?
It's shocking that he is excluding one section of the
population and it's just because he's a blatant racist.
He should be supporting this to end HIV transmission.
Yeah, in terms of public health, it makes absolutely no sense whatsoever.
It is just another dog whistle so that it can be run
in the Daily Mail, the Daily Express, to get people angry that
asylum seekers are freeloaders and getting handouts, which is not the case.
This is a public health matter.
It's to stop transmission and it's to deal with this virus.
I mean, great leaps and bounds have been made.
We're really getting there.
There's still a lot of work to do, particularly
around the issue of stigma related to HIV.
But, like, Nigel Farage making these statements, it's really ignorant.
It's really crass.
It makes no sense.
And it's just going to make public health worse.
That's my rant over!
[laughter]
So, yeah, I think circling back to what we said at the start, I mean,
there are so many, many reasons to not support Nigel Farage, to not support Reform,
and to not get swept up in the whole idea of this populist movement.
But there is just one very simple example that we can give.
He's using asylum seekers as some sort of dog whistle.
And there is also an implication in there, you know, he's using
HIV because it is, for many of these people that he's trying
to target with this rhetoric, many of those people will still have
it in their head that this is a gay disease.
You know, all of that horrible messaging from the
80s and 90s is still stuck in their brains.
And there is, that it's almost implied.
So it's a double whammy for Farage.
He gets to attack asylum seekers and the gays.
Yeah.
And the thing is, studies have shown that actually
it's heterosexual people that are the biggest... transmitters?
Yeah, it's the most cases are now
transmitted in heterosexual people, between heterosexual people.
Yeah. But again, it's just going back to the 80s and all
that horrendous advertising about AIDS when it first was discovered.
So, yes, we're not fans of Reform or Nigel Farage.
And if anybody's listening to the podcast that is
fans of Nigel Farage or Reform, kindly fuck off.
[laughter]
Please just, I mean, please just look a bit more into their policies
because so many people have buyer's remorse in America for supporting Trump.
And if, should Farage get into power in the UK, the same thing
is going to happen, you know, a year, two years down the line.
So many people are going to regret their vote, just as so many people
have done with Keir Starmer because he has let so many people down.
He's let so many people in the LGBT community
down since he got into power as well.
And yes, people are frustrated.
They're feeling disenfranchised.
But...
Snake oil salesmen like Farage are not the answer.
Right. Shall we move on to the fitness section?
Yeah, let's do it.
Just before we get into the fitness section, remember that we
offer online coaching specifically for gay, bi and trans guys.
So stay tuned after this section for details on how you
can book in for a free discovery call with us.
So this is something that absolutely made my blood boil during
the week, but we have found the worst PT ever.
Now, we don't actually know who the person is.
We've found someone's TikTok talking about their experience and
they have labelled it as the worst PT ever.
And once we tell you what this PT did to this woman, I think you'll agree.
So yeah, obviously this podcast is largely
for gay, bi, and trans guys, okay?
Now, this TikTok video that we found, probably making an
assumption here, but I think she's a cisgender woman who
had a shit PT and she is recounting her story.
So we're going to go through her TikTok video just now and bitch
about the points that she makes because we 100% agree with her.
Absolutely flabbergasted.
Right, should we take these one by one then, Alan?
Yes, because I have a lot to say.
Well, so does she, so let's hear it in her own words.
First one, don't have butter on your
toast because it's a waste of calories.
He was literally like, there is no point in having butter.
Don't, if you're, I wouldn't even have toast, but
if you're going to, definitely don't have butter.
Honest to God!
I mean, he said to her, I wouldn't even have toast, but
if you have to have toast, don't have butter on it.
What the actual..?
What is she just going to have dry toast?!
For fuck's sake!
So, yeah, let's just, let's rewind.
So, first of all, the butter thing.
See if you want to have butter, just have butter.
Yeah.
If you are tracking your calories, put it into whatever tracking app that
you're using, enjoy the butter, and just move on with your day.
I think we should qualify this for anybody who is
maybe listening for the first time who doesn't know.
So, we run Outlifting, which is an online fitness business.
We help to coach gay, bi, and trans guys with
nutrition coaching, accountability coaching, workout plans, all of that.
A lot of the work that we do breaks down the
toxicity that exists in certain corners of the fitness industry.
And that's very much what we're talking about here.
This is toxic nutrition advice.
Absolute bullshit.
It is.
That's what it is.
But yeah, you're absolutely right.
And I am, like, shocked at some of the things
that I hear from people around this sort of stuff.
I'm going to give an example.
So, last night, what did we have for dinner?
We had a beige dinner.
So-called, because everything was beige.
Yeah.
It was frozen pizza, chips.
It was...
- Tequenos. - Tequenos!
Nuggets.
Soya nuggets, yeah.
So, we made sure that there was protein in there with the
soya nuggets, but it was not a nutritious and healthy meal.
Do we eat like that all the time?
No, we do not.
We'd been out all day.
We had to rush back, get Haggis our dog out a walk.
And I was like, I cannot be fucked making dinner.
So, we made an executive decision to have a beige dinner.
Now, we had it.
We moved on with our night.
- Brilliant. - Yeah!
But it's not the end of the world, you know.
See if you're having stuff like this every once in a while.
Great.
If you're trying to change your body composition, lose weight, whatever
it might be, and you're having that every night, then yeah,
there needs to be a change to your lifestyle.
Yeah, absolutely.
Everything in moderation.
Quite a lot of the coaching work that
we do with clients coaches the 80-20 rule.
So long as at least 80% of the time you're eating a
balanced diet, quote unquote healthy food, fruits, vegetables, all that kind of
stuff, that other 20% you can be a bit more indulgent with.
And if you are hopefully tracking your calories, making sure that you're
not overeating, making sure that your macronutrient balance is right, there's not
really an issue because life is for living and enjoying.
Can I just say though, see butter, that's definitely not in that 20%.
[laughs]
Stick that in your 80%.
It's absolutely fine to have.
So yeah, let's move on to the next one
because I'm pure boiling with rage right now.
Next up, he told me at least I lost weight when talking about when I
was ill and I wasn't eating and I lost like 4kg in about 5 days.
Right...
[laughs]
So this would be the first instance where I am sensing the misogyny.
Yes, absolutely.
Absolutely.
And there's more of it to come.
But to lose 4kg in 5 days is unbelievable.
That is not healthy weight loss.
Obviously, because this person was ill.
And to say, well, at least you lost weight because you were ill.
My God.
I know.
Crazy.
No sympathy.
No understanding about being ill.
It's just like, oh, at least you lost some weight.
Awful. Awful!
This person is meant to be a coach.
And for me very much, a coach is
somebody who encourages, who helps, who inspires.
That is not inspiring whatsoever.
That is not encouraging.
That really is just going to make somebody who is recovering from
illness and is already feeling pretty bad, even worse about themselves.
Yeah. [laughs]
And that's the tea.
Okay, next one.
Only eat Eatlean cheese.
Now, I don't necessarily have anything against Eatlean cheese.
I think it has its moments melted.
I think it's actually okay.
However, this was like properly demonizing any other kind of cheese.
This is kind of back to the butter thing.
Yeah, no food should ever be demonized.
You should never feel guilty for eating any
kind of food, no matter what it is.
Now, like she said there, reduced fat cheese will have its place.
If you are on, you know, a certain amount of macros and you
are watching those macros, then you're just being smart about what you're consuming
to be able to meet like your fat macros, for example.
But you should never eat that because it's demonized.
Just if you want to have something, then have it.
Exactly.
And if you have specific goals that you're trying to meet
with your nutrition, so long as you are tracking your nutrition
and you're tracking your macronutrients, you're going to succeed if you're
tracking and you're managing to hit your targets.
So long as it fits within your macronutrients and your calories, who cares?
And that's the tea.
And that's the cheese.
Hang on.
Right, so next one.
When we used to do check-in pictures, he would circle in red
what I needed to change and circle in green what was good.
Good was like my glutes or something like that.
And red was cellulite.
Any kind of fats, any like, if I was wearing like
tight pants and like I had like a little bit of
fat hanging over or anything like that, circled in red.
Any cellulite, circled in red.
Hip dips, circled in red.
Yet again, you would not do that with any client, but
there is just such an obvious point here to make that a
man doing that to a woman is just so wrong.
And again, reeks of misogyny.
I'm so angry, I can't even speak.
Honestly, what gives him the right to do something like that?
And circling it and pointing out these areas and
saying, this is what you need to change.
Hang on a minute.
She is paying you money to guide and support and coach her.
Like, honestly, I'm speechless.
The way that we coach is totally different
because it's not about just this end goal.
It's about learning to love yourself at every stage.
It's about celebrating every win.
Pointing out to somebody what you perceive as flaws on their body makes
them focus on those things rather than the achievements that they have made.
Perhaps that week that he did that, she
had increased her weights in the gym.
She was lifting heavier.
Her fitness was, you know, improving.
Maybe she had some real wins there.
And by doing what he did, he totally detracted from those.
And again, this comes back to coaching style.
You should inspire and motivate and encourage.
He is doing the opposite.
Yeah, he's the worst PT ever, as we said.
- He is a shit PT. [laughter]
But yeah, love yourself.
I'm turning into RuPaul here.
Love yourself at every stage of your journey.
It is about learning to embrace where you're at and embrace your
wins and embrace all of the small changes that you're making.
That doesn't mean that you just pretend that you're happy with everything.
This change doesn't come overnight.
It's an incremental process and it is a daily practice.
See this next one.
I just can't believe this happened.
Next up, he walked me around an entire Sainsbury's
pointing out every single food I shouldn't have.
Like every single aisle.
Every single aisle pointing out all the foods I couldn't have.
She actually wrote in her note on this that she was
in the Sainsbury's for hours with him while he did this.
Why?
Why would you walk somewhere around the supermarket
telling them foods that they can't have?
Again, you're demonising foods.
This woman, what is her relationship with foods?
Because if it was okay before or it was a good relationship, I
tell you what, it was not going to be after that experience.
Yeah.
So, I mean, we're not going to go into massive depth
here about this because this is an entirely different subject.
But we all know that there are serious issues with eating disorders.
And coaching, the way this guy coaches, he is
going to give people eating disorders with this nonsense
that he's preaching and the methods that he's using.
Imagine the stress you'd be under the next time that you go
into the supermarket and be like, is this something I can have?
Can I not have this?
Like, is this going to spoil my goals?
Like, your mind would just be absolutely frazzled.
Absolutely.
And I'm pretty sure that that PT, if he saw the dinner that we
had last night, he would, you know, he would blow his top because basically
everything that was on our plate would have been on his ban list.
And you know what?
It's something that we do very rarely.
Maybe every two months or so, we might have a dinner like that.
Most of the time, everything is homemade.
But we wouldn't demonize it.
And we're guilty of having food like that sometimes.
And do you know what?
I can't even believe I just used the word guilty
because there should be no guilt attached to it whatsoever.
I would love for him to know that we're
PTs and we'd eaten that kind of food.
Could you imagine his response then?
I know.
Honestly, it's just so toxic.
Yeah, there are certain foods that you don't want to eat all the time.
You don't want to eat every day.
But to actually parade somebody through a
supermarket and say, yes, no, yes, no.
That is horrific.
Crazy!
I'm getting small dick energy from this guy.
Yes, absolutely.
Absolutely.
Okay, we've got one last one and this is an absolute doozy.
And lastly, I think I had like a meal out with friends.
I think it was even a birthday meal and he pointed at
me the next day, pointing out my stomach, quite frankly, like prodding
my stomach, saying, yeah, that's fat you gained from that meal.
Talk to me.
I can't.
I actually can't.
This woman went out for her birthday and then the next day
obviously had a PT session and he was prodding her belly saying
the food you ate last night has made you fat.
First of all, you don't understand science because
that wouldn't happen as quickly as that.
Second of all, that just wouldn't happen.
If this guy was her boyfriend and not her PT
what we would be saying is
that he is controlling, coercive and abusive.
Why would you accept that sort of
language and behaviour from someone like that?
You wouldn't accept it from your partner, so why?
I'm not saying she obviously didn't accept it,
so why does he think it's acceptable?
In the video, she says that she has blocked him on all platforms.
She has cut him out.
More power to her.
She's brilliant.
I kind of wish she had have named and shamed as well.
I understand why she didn't, but this guy could
be doing this to other people as well now.
And it's so bad.
It's so unethical.
It's so unprofessional that he is taking money
from people to treat them like absolute shit.
And he probably thinks he's an amazing PT for doing
all this, but he clearly is very insecure about himself
and doesn't have a clue about what he's doing.
I'm assuming.
Yeah.
Obviously, all of the toxicity that we try to break down in the fitness
industry, a lot of it is exemplified by what we've been talking about today.
And I think the reason that we do talk about this stuff as
well is because we want to be very open and we want to
allow listeners to feel that they can give themselves permission to not beat
themselves up, to not have this toxic dialogue in their head, and to
recognise when they see this information online, in their feed, in their algorithms,
that they can spot it and empower themselves to swipe away or to
block or whatever else because it is crap advice.
Yeah, there's so much crap out there.
And we speak to clients about you don't need to be perfect.
You just need to be consistent.
And unfortunately, a lot of the time, the message that is out
on social media is that you need to be absolutely perfect at
nutrition and training and everything else that goes along with it.
And you don't.
You just need to be consistent and enjoy what you're doing.
I think that's most important.
Yeah.
Have we ranted enough?
I think we have ranted enough.
Okay. I think that is good that I feel that that was cathartic.
I have vented and I am ready to wrap up the show.
Let's do it.
Okay.
If you feel that you do need some help
with your fitness, that's what we're here for.
So we run Outlifting, which is an online fitness business
aimed at helping gay, bi and trans guys work on
their fitness, work on their bodies and build unstoppable confidence.
We are the complete opposite
of that shit PT that we just talked about.
Our coaching style is much different.
We break down the toxicity.
We work with you.
We offer a really bespoke one-on-one support package that
includes weekly video calls, that includes daily chats.
We are there for you to hold your hand every step of the way.
If you feel that you could benefit from what we
offer and you would like to chat with us in
a no-pressure environment, we offer free, no-obligation discovery video chats.
To book one of those, just click the link in the show notes
and you can select the date and time that is best for you.
You can meet with one of us and you can take some time to figure
out whether we are the right fit for you to help you meet your goals.
So please click the link, book in, we would love to chat with you.
And if you love the show, why don't you take some time out and
consider giving us a five-star rating on the streaming platform you listen to us?
That's us for this week.
We will have a new show next week.
Make sure you're subscribed on your podcast platform
of choice to keep up with the conversation.
But for now, over and Outlifting.
[music]